i keep running into walls that i can't break down

 

as someone with no talent

of pouring her heart out

to any living soul

 

i don't believe this piece

because it break me even more

because i'm revealed to myself

because such fairytale is

nonexistant in my life

 

i just....

i just need to smile

and assure myself

that all is well

easy

 

We'll Listen

You're the girl who cries in silence
and doesn't let anyone see your pain.
You're the girl that tries her hardest to make everyone okay,
even when you're world is crashing around you.

You're the girl who always smiles,
the one who tries to make things funny.
You're the girl with broken eyes,
the one that tries to get over the heartache.

I'm the friend that tries to understand,
who tries to empathize but I can't even get close to your feelings.
I'm the friend who's trying to make you laugh more,
maybe it'll help you not think about your life.

I'm the friend who will always be there,
even when you leave here.
Me, and everyone else,
we'll listen so you don't have to have the world on your shoulders

taken directly from here

one way conversation

she jut go on and on

and on

about her life

about her love

about her mind

as if i'm a miracle being

who could magically solve it all

but i was wrong

she didn't ask for any help

because her tears dried

because her smile formed

after she had done talking

she patted my head

as if a 'thank you'

i mewed softly

saying 'welcome'

'us' is just like a bubble, when i'm expecting it to last, it popped. and smeared my face.

my yesterdays has no regret, though 'twas stupid

though 'twas stupid

but 'twas among my bestest

moments in my life

i was afraid of letting go

wanting to hold on the whole time

but as i sit here

alone, i realized

the sweet tunes you sang to me

are yesterday's memories

like the time passed's by

the tunes flies above

and went to nothingness

leaving a taste of sweetness

at the tip of my tongue

which this moment 'sall 

bitter and sour

 

cute cute cute XD

after XiaXue made exposure on Peter Coffin's 

fake girlfriend, Kimi Kobayashi, i thought of wandering 

around to see people's reaction

then i met XiaoRishu

she was condemning Peter Coffin as well (who 

wouldn't?) but in a cute cute cute way XD this girl is 

cute cute cute XD

 and eventually i come across this video

 which is a mixture of 

gross idea

+

cute background

i adore this girl <3

i do not usually like older men....

but these gems are (i admit willingly) are people i can say still look cute despite their age. and right now, in my mind there's only two

craig chester

whom i discover while watching a comedy flick with some meaning in it. i did not particularly like the movie, but i just can't keep my eyes off of him ;)he's gay , means a plus point haha

david caruso

i've always liked CSI series, and i don't mind missing some of the case's details when dear ol' Horatio is right there at the scene ;)gotta love the way he peeks from behind of the shades XD

anthony hopkins?

i just love the fact that he hold a bizarre character, Hannibal Lecter. he was not really cute to me, but his eyes are...mesmerizing :)

 

danny boy

honestly, i've never liked any folk song very much, but not until i heard Danny Boy.it's sort of sad, sweet and ... calming.

to me, this song is about a young boy, named (of course) Danny who had to go to war. thus he had to leave whoever it is, mother or girlfriend or a close friend. the persona assumed that she/he will be dead by the time Danny went back home

the melody is just one of the greatest i've ever heard of

and the lyrics are so so so sweet and beautifully arranged to convey the song's message 

i particularly like the version sung by this little guy many many years ago, 

who in recent times had turn into this very fine young man XD

summer dip

you smiled shyly

while brushing the golden locks off

your sweat-covered face

"come on

it's just us girls

and mother nature"

said Cherry

i just nodded

while quietly undoing the buttons

of my blue summer dress

well, it is good weather
with just right amount of

heat and moisture

it's a long journey here

and you figured

actually, what i think you figured

we can't just waste this time

just to add fats and calories into our system

you took off you pretty little hat

and with blushed cheeks

lowered the strapless dress so slowly

while Cherry cheekily

glued her eyes on your skin

as more and more exposed

when everyone's ready

off we go

when he left

will he come back?

i don't know

when will mama be back here?

to protect us?

she's gone forever

will you protect me from his rage?

i will.

why would you bear so much pain for me?

you can just run

and leave me

 

because you're my little brother

and i will look after you forever

... Like I Did Yesterday

taken directly from here

An Evening

look, honey

she brought you an umbrella

why?

because you and her

are best friends forever

she got your back 

and you got hers

now that it's raining more than ever

please know that you'll still have each other

you can stay under her umbrella

and whisper whatever you want to hear

and go wherever you want to go

*smiles* 

 

but be sure to get back before the sun set

or your father will get mad

he'd want his little daughter to be home

when he's here, tired and need your affection

*nods*

*kiss*

*waves goodbye*

the ray

i live following the ray

because i was born this way

i couldn't be as hateful as they

because the love in me, stay

being them means not i will stray

i will be okay, i will be okay

:)

I'm Not Even Naturalist, but...

instead of these four walls

instead of the noise of hockey games

instead of the endless world of internet

instead of the techno songs

i'd rather be someplace

where there's birds chirping

where there's river flowing

where there's grass growing

i'm not even a naturalist, but

nature would have done me better

than this cold world of modernisation

The Lovers Bridge

the lovers bridge in france

where they lock the locks

along the bridge

as how they hoped

their love would be

everlasting

unchanged

still

pretty little daisies

in my younger days

my favorite activity was

dozing off

no matter where

i don't care when

sleeping gives me comfort

napping gives me happiness

but alas, because i heart sleeping so much

my teachers hate me

though some prefer me over the noisy child

my friends ignore me

because they liked talking on and on and on

and

i missed someone

the one who

everytime i fell asleep

everytime i woke up

there they would be

pretty little daisies

with their sweet fragrance

and those makes me smiles

i couldn't ask

because

i couldn't talk

but

whoever that was

then

i'd like to thank you

in my world of silence and loneliness

your cute little act brings me happiness

my beautiful lass

she lies there

her rosebud lips is smiling

her skin shines in midst of the overwhelming moisture

her cheeks glow with most crimson blush

her eyes closed peacefully, she's fallen too deep in her nap

i can't believe she was 

no longer moving

no longer breathing

no longer mine

taggin' thingy : start 6 sentences with "i'm (age) but i still...."

1. i'm 19 but i still get nightmare from a scary movie i didn't even watch

2. i'm 19 but i still love being cuddled

3. i'm 19 but i still afraid of being scolded

4. i'm 19 but i still like to sulk, all the time, especially with people i love the most

5. i'm 19 but i still ask everything from my parents... tee-hee...

6. i'm 19 but i still think something nasty nestled under my bed

anyone reading this, i'd like to know your says too :) 

  

where stars don't shine

i live in a world

where the stars don't shine

where the lands are barren

where happiness is nonexistant

i live during the time

when the smiles are fake

when what's important is authority

when everyone wants to be somebody

i live here in midst of people

who love lying

who love breaking people's heart

who love... only themselves

 

my pair in class

the first time i saw you

i was captivated by your beauty

drowned in your eyes so blue

drugged by your lips red as cherry

we were meant to sit together

and i grasped the chance to know you better

but after weeks of sitting next to each other

you're no longer a girl who could make me stutter

 but still

a girl i would chase after

the one i love the most

the one i love the most

was neither daddy nor mummy

was neither bobby nor sandy

but among us, she is the littlest

the one i love the most

well, you can say my love is unwelcomed

little time she would talk to me, the rest frowned

and that was nothing that i can boast

the one i love the most

stared blankly when i left for summer camp

i maybe mistaken but her cheeks looked damp

 nonetheless, i went there, thoroughly abused

the one i love the most

when i get home after a century of absence

jump at me with in her blue pools the happiest glance

mummy said the whole time i was badly missed

the one i love the most

smiled as her face stuck onto my chest

this moment was one i love the best

knowing his little sister also love him 'est among the rest

 

i guess.......

i guess it's okay

it's not like i have any use to you

and i'm certainly not fun to be with

neither can i make you as happy

those new barbie dolls

and handsome ken dolls

are way better

than the old-fashioned teddy bear

i am

i have gotten used to be thrown away 

when i bore the people

and i am familiarized with sweet sweet words

they say right before they stepped

on my heart, nonetheless

and i have few experiences

of being heart-broken

so i guess it's okay

for you to ditch me too

dont give me hope

     when you know damn well

you can't fulfill it
 

in midst of nothingness

when i say i'm happy

they will say "grow up!"

when i say i'm sad

they will say "come on!"

when i say i'm scared

they will say "what a chicken!"

when i say i'm lonely

they will leave me by myself

so what am i to do

in midst of nothingness

i create another world

of unreached happiness and companies

where there

i don't have to speak

and be rejected

subtly

or

directly

which both

'

'

'

hurt

my favourite scene from my favourite movie

when can i be as wise-ass and as bitchy as this girl?

oh well, i guess.... IN MY DREAMS

 

when he was a little boy...

a bubbly lad of six

of no worries

of no burden

he likes to wander alone

anticipating trifles of nature

which evening will it rain?

when will the tree bear fruits?

and he'd bring with him a stack of papers

carefully wrapped in plastic

just in case

and he'd sit so high on the building

 where, it doesn't matter

when, he doesn't care

how, only he knew

and he's carefully write words

beautiful words he heard

from mother to father

from sister to brother

from natasha to him

onto the pieces of papers

with them, he crafted airplanes

though with no engines

they flew so high

though with no use

they made the day more beautiful to some

How True....

how true it can be 

that

it’s better to have nobody

than to have someone who is half here

or doesn’t want to be here at all

unfortunately

a lot of people is that kind

it's just the same with those

who left, merrily

when they found perfect companies

me?

been there

(AM being there NOW)

done that

 

Cupid's Crash

it's just 

frustrating

watching

the plots i've been 

creating

awaiting

in the end it's just

end

gone

:(